Yes, Religion IS a Crutch: How ableism is connected to our disconnection

“Religion is a crutch.”

Crutches are good!

It is the opiate of the masses. It is the cause of war and division. These latter two are just really hyperbole and absolutism. But let’s talk about how it’s a crutch and the relationship between that idea and ableism.

Twice in my life I’ve used a cane. The first time, I never really left the house. I was so ashamed of my weakened body that I couldn’t bring myself to let people see it, to use the cane in public. Ten years later I am having to use the cane again. But in the intervening years a lot has changed. I’m older. I live in a different city. I have had a lot of experiences that massively shifted my view, including college, divorce, remarriage, just to name a few. So this time I have used the cane whenever I needed to. Even if I could do without it. Even a little help makes life easier, saves me a little pain, saves me a little energy.

In the process of becoming a cane user I started to pay a lot of attention to my own internalized ableism. I was humiliated by the cane the first time around. I had come to the belief that a failing body was my own failure made manifest, visible. Something that I needed to hide from the world. It is complicated how I came to that. A toxic brew of perfectionism, protestant ethics, social contract theory and a lot of other cultural influences that lead us to believe that those who are imperfect, who can’t contribute, are merely a drag on society and therefore Other. It has led to the warehousing of “imperfect” children. It has led to the eugenics movement. It has justified the poor treatment of countless individuals who can’t care for themselves without help or at all.

To some it might sound like hyperbole to say that my using a cane was a victory over all that. But it’s not an overstatement at all. I know. I am on the inside here.

Using a cane ten years ago felt like a relinquishment of my agency. I was carrying the evidence, in full view of the world, that I was no longer of value. I no longer mattered to society. Holy shit, that is ugly. Not least of which, because in admitting my own shame, I have to admit that I on some level held those beliefs about other people who needed assistance. My very liberal frontal lobes would never have admitted that. Maybe it was mostly fear. My great aunt was a victim of the eugenics program at Sonoma State Hospital in the 1930s. I know what has been done to people who were thought not to contribute to society. But whether it was judgment or my own fear, the result was the same. I had a deeply held bias against people with disabilities.

In the 80s I remember lots of things being called a “crutch.” Alcohol is the one I remember most vividly. The sentiment was the same for most substances. Substance use was broadly considered to be merely moral failure then, and by implication, using a crutch was a moral failure. One of my hobby horses in philosophy is addiction. My mind was blown to discover that some philosophers acknowledge that using drugs to ease suffering might actually be the addicts best option.* Yes, drugs are a crutch. And it turns out sometimes you need a crutch when there are no other viable options. So, the problem here isn’t the use of a crutch, but the type of crutch that is available.

All these ideas about responsibility, the moralizing of health, the shame of being imperfect kept me from using a cane when I needed it. The cane was a symbol of failure.

Now to the idea that religion is a crutch. Yes, it can be. And sometime we just need a fucking crutch. Are some crutches better than others? YES. Some crutches are more harmful than others. Does this mean all crutches are bad? NO. 

When we use ableist language to describe something helpful and useful, we cut off access to help. The same logic that left me homebound because I needed a mobility aid keeps people from having the comfort and guidance that can be found in religion. I know so many people who have been hurt and harmed by organized religion. And the particular religions that I have seen this the most with are the same ones that teach us the ideas that lead us to believe that a god is punishing people with poor health and rewarding people with good health. And those same religions lead followers to believe that it is the one true religion. It is pretty logical to come out of that believing that there are no other options, and that all religion is bad. The only other option would seem to be Four Horseman style Atheism. And since religion is a crutch anyway, why bother?

For context, I grew up in a Southern Baptist family, attended a Baptist elementary school, and have seen the best and worst of both of those things. In high school we had a guest come to my English class to talk about comparative religious studies and he did exactly what my conservative school district was afraid he would. Planted a seed that grew into a Buddhist practice. My whole adult life I was privately studying Eastern religion while attending Evangelical churches, Calvinist Churches, Progressive churches, and seriously contemplated attending seminary. You see I had felt called to ministry and spent many years ignoring it, because at the time I thought the only possible call was to the church, but the call was in fact in a very different direction. I then went through a period of devout atheism, which in my case was a denial, not to say that others’ experience is, just that mine was. As I left the protestant faith and went through my own deconstruction, I held the hands of many others who followed me. Many have found Christian churches that are more liberal with their salvation. Others have left all religious practice, and some float around in the miasma of spirituality which is becoming more mainstream. All wrestle with these restrictive religious principles that lead to shame about our bodies, our imperfection, and our worth. I have, as a result of my path, borne witness to many experiences that chart similarly to mine.

I look around me and I see a world of people swimming around alone. From an anthropological perspective, religion was functional from the beginning. It gave humans something that their very unique prefrontal cortexes needed, which was a REASON to do things. And don’t we all still need a reason? How many people don’t make their own beds because they don’t see the point? We need a reason to do everything. We are starved for connection because the tail has been wagging the dog in most major religions for a very long time. And the most ridiculous thing about this to me is that most Christian religions, and I use this example because of my own familiarity, are built around the idea that we come together FOR God. But from what I came to understand from my own theological study, a God like that doesn’t NEED us. But we sure as hell need each other. The whole reason religion was functional was because it kept people together, united humans in common purpose to create bonds. It tricks us into spending time together. That is how we form attachments to others, and that is what keeps us alive.

I am not here to say all religions are great, many are slowly killing themselves by slowly killing people, isolating people, they no longer serve a function that supports the people within them. They are eating themselves alive. Those are the ones that cause war and harm and suffering. Those are not a crutch, but a cudgel. A stick can be put to many uses, you see.

It saddens me so much to see how the deconstruction of my ableism was so tied to the deconstruction of my faith. Since I have freed myself from the cudgel, I have been able to use the crutch. Literally and figuratively. It turns out there are religions that focus on community, on the wellbeing of the members (the body), on developing discernment, on the moral welfare of the individual and the whole. And all of these elements have greatly contributed to the continuing healing of my own internalized ableism and my general ableism. A crutch can help carry us through a time of healing, for some it will be required for the long run. Either way a crutch is not inherently bad, and often necessary. 

Use what you need to in order to get through. May it help you and not harm you, and may you find others to help along the way. You might even find some through religion, just saying.

*Upon request I can dig out the citation. I am just tired this morning and didn’t care to leaf through my massive pile of lit unless someone actually needs it.